Live Well, Be Healthy: Caregivers need care, too

July 16--Realizing a loved one is showing signs of Alzheimer's disease or dementia can be upsetting and leave caregivers with a sense of helplessness, but there are ways families can get assistance.

Tiffani Maloskey, a licensed practical nurse and director of the secured unit at Elmcroft of Chippewa, runs a support group for family members who are caring for a loved one with Alzheimer's sisease and dementia. She said the first step once caregivers start to notice signs of the disease that they contact a physician right away. She said there are some medications that can slow the process if they are administered in the early stages of the disease.

She also recommends the family follow a routine and give their loved one a feeling of importance by allowing them to continue with activities as much as possible. She said while some people have a tendency to try to correct their loved ones when they forget things, sometimes the best course of action is to meet them in their reality. For example, if someone with the disease insists they have to get their child off the bus, and their child is an adult, a caregiver may tell them someone else is picking up the child, Maloskey said.

That's where support groups can be beneficial. Maloskey said caregivers can talk to each other about the situations they encounter and exchange ideas about how to handle them.

Maloskey acknowledges that attending a support group can be difficult for caregivers because many people who have Alzheimer's or dementia cannot be left alone. But there are services available through local agencies that provide people who will sit while the caregivers go out for awhile. There are also nursing facilities, including Elmcroft, that will provide respite care on a short-term basis.

"I see a lot of caregivers come in, and they're just burnt out," Maloskey said. "They're not taking care of themselves."

Maloskey recommends caregivers try to give themselves a break and manage their stress as much as possible because it's not good for either side if the caregiver is stressed out. "Any kid of stress relief they can get, whether it be exercise or getting away from the situation," she said.

When it comes to the decision to place a loved one in permanent care, it can be difficult for family members. "I think a lot of people struggle with that decision ... ultimately a lot of guilt falls on them," Maloskey said.

There are services that will help families find placement for their loved one. Maloskey said one such service is A Place for Mom.

She said it is not uncommon for caregivers to call Elmcroft and talk to her about their situation and ask questions about the disease and about placement. Elmcroft also offers educational speakers a couple of times a year, she said.

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